You know that feeling you get when you are supposed to do something? I get it when I’m supposed to write something. It’s a feeling that won’t leave me alone until I get those words typed (or written out) and shared. But I’m holding back. The idea of writing has been leaving me feeling pretty vulnerable lately. When it comes down to it, I am living like I care more about what other people think than what God thinks.
My big objection is this: Who am I to think I have anything say? There are people who have seen me at my ugliest who will think I’m a fraud. And there are those folks that I’m sure don’t really like me for some reason or other. I know they would roll their eyes at anything I have to say. What about those people whose last interaction with me was one in which I wronged them? Oh, and Lord, I don’t understand it, but there are certain situations where I am consistently a disaster. You surely don’t want to use a voice like mine. And what if others think I’m trying to make myself important?. . . . My list of objections is long.
I wonder if Moses had these thoughts? God called him to deliver the Israelites out of Egypt. It was as clear as any calling could be. Still, he questioned the directive. I wonder if he was afraid of what his people would think of him. The last they knew of Moses, he had lost his temper, murdered a man and ran away. And now God was calling him to go back and face them.
I’m empathizing with Moses’ hesitation.
I’m writing it out here in black and white because maybe you feel the same. Maybe you’re being held back from saying, “yes” to full obedience because you fear the opinions of others. I’m not writing out of my area of strength here, but my weakness. I would rather come to this blog from the other side– the side that says, “I conquered that fear and here I am.” But I think I’m ready to move that direction.
Can we do this together?
So, go write your book, go back to college, plant a church, adopt, lead that small group, become a foster parent, record that song, start a blog, record a podcast, start that business, go oversesas., . . . whatever it is that you’re sure everyone else will think you are ridiculous for doing, but you are positive is God’s call for you.
Let’s do this because God’s call is bigger than our egos and our fears.